When Kitty was a littler person I used to write down all the funny things she said. It’s one of those moments as a parent when you look down at this tiny little person that you made and gave birth to and nurtured and nourished and watched over, who can speak. Actual genuine words, in roughly the right order, and so beautifully back to front in their logic that we’d struggle to keep a straight face.
But alas for Elma and Pip, I’ve had less chance to keep the same notes for them. Partly it’s just that life is busier now; I look back now on the days when I blogged every single day and wondered how on earth I was doing it, I’m not aiming half so high now and even then I don’t write nearly as many posts in me as I would like. And part I’ll admit is that they are the second and third children in the family, and I’m afraid that their sister will always have the novelty value; it’s the flip side of the coin that means that she is also the guinea pig so I don’t think they’re missing out too much.
But in my week at home I got to spend so much time with all three of them (and John), and to really hear how both Elma and Pip see the world. During most week days I only see them first thing in the morning when they’ve just woken up, and last thing before supper story and bedtime, and it’s not exactly their finest hour, so there tends to be less chatter and more “Mummeeeeee”.
Elma is trying her hand at jokes, probably because Kitty is also experimenting with jokes, largely of the “why did the chicken cross the road” variety, but Elma’s are just wonderfully factual:
Why did the caterpillar climb the tree?
Because he wanted to get some leaves.
Shortly followed by:
Why did the witch get the caterpillar?
Because she wanted to put him in the soup
And my personal favourite:
Why did the elephant wear glasses?
Because he wanted to see properly without blinking.
She falls off her chair laughing at them; the only thing funnier in her world is her Daddy saying “I want some chicken and a can of coke” in a fake scouse accent, which all three kids think is screamingly funny, to the point that they try to trick John into saying it, which is quite hard to do, given that his usual accent is Yorkshire.
Pip’s thoughts have, for the most part, been running along a protective streak; it’s as if he learns things during the day and then wants to make sure that I know them too. It’s usually just as he’s about to go to bed, a big bundle of bright eyes and soft cotton sleeping bag, curled up in my arms for the final cuddle of the day, and he’ll suddenly look up at me:
Mama! You shouldn’t eat buses, should you!
He also heard us talking about Bake Off Creme de la Creme and thinks that Mummy and Daddy watch a program on Cranky the Crane after he’s gone to bed – and he wasn’t very impressed with it!.
But the best comes via John, when he and Pip were turning into our road earlier in the week and spotted our neighbours’ cat sat on our drive. It’s a very silly cat and it likes to think it can take on cars so you quite often have to nudge the car gently onto the drive, beep the horn and wait for it to stop prancing about before you can park.
Mama went beep beep!
Mummy beeped the horn did she?
Yes, at the idjot. Beep horn at idjot Daddy!
Oh Mummy beeped at the cat!
after a small pause
Did we run over the cat Daddy?
No, we didn’t run over the cat.
We don’t run over cats do we Daddy?
No, that’s right, we don’t.
It’s OK, we can run over cat on Monday!
Well that’s going to make for an eventful start to the week!