What level of has knitting obsession reached in your life? Find out with our handy one-part test.
Scenario: H’s cousin has glandular fever (poor girl) and is going to be held off school for a while. Your father-in-law calls to chat and mentions that she’s feeling a little down in the dumps as she has nothing to do but sit and rest, and could she perhaps acquire some funky stripy socks to cheer her up.
(A) Make vague references to his daughter’s 30th birthday present (still very WIP), the state of the Christmas knitting (not yet started), the fine weather we have enjoyed recently, and say that you will send her a card and a box of chocs and call her.
(B) Delightedly comply with his request, proceed at once to the stash cupboard, peruse all of the sock yarn (without revealing to your husband the true extent of the stash), declare that none of it is the right pink, and head off to the shops excited by the prospect of new knitting.
(C) Recall that Aunt M is a knitter herself, weigh up the chances that Cousin H has been taught to knit at some point, and realise that what is really needed is something not too taxing to occupy little H while she recuperates, something that she can do tucked up on a sofa watching bad daytime tv. In short, she needs not the socks, but the raw materials, and here in your hand you have the perfect crook to bring another lamb into the fold. You choose a selection of appropriately pink self-striping yarn and Anna’s fantastic Sock Starter Kit, and send little H a card with your phone number in it.
If you answered:
(A) – you either have a LOT of Christmas knitting, or knitting is for you a pleasant hobby with useful results, a pastime that you could give up if we ran out of sheep tomorrow. The woolly fire burns not within your soul.
(B) – you have a very well insulated home. The fleece is strong with you my friend. You may also be extremely organised with the Christmas knitting/ delusional, and generous to a fault.
(C) – oh wise one! You suspect that demand creates supply and know the power of the woolly sock knitting as well as the power of the woolly sock. You also have a well insulated home.
My answer? See for yourself: